Asking Eric: Advice from Reader to Previous Question
Dear Eric: Your response to "Concerned Dad," the letter writer worried his daughter had fallen for another "player," left me surprised. The warning signal was clear in the father's third paragraph:
“…after over three months, they have not seen each other on a weekend.”
The man is either married or in another serious relationship. I share this opinion from the viewpoint of many single women who have heard similar "tired, migraine, busy" excuses. The daughter needs to face reality, and the father must realize she isn’t ready to do that. Thank you for the many enjoyable morning talks with my husband.
Dear Been There: You’re likely right. If the daughter had written to me, I would have told her to find someone who can meet her outside business hours. But the father, though well-intentioned, is too involved in his daughter’s romantic life. He’s offered his advice; her choices are now her own.
We can’t pressure our loved ones into wiser decisions. Yet, as Ann Landers once said, when they wake up and smell the coffee, we can be there — with a fresh cup and a caring heart.
For more advice, contact Eric Thomas at [email protected] or write to P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram or subscribe to his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.
Author’s Summary
This exchange reflects on a father’s concern for his daughter’s questionable relationship, urging empathy and patience rather than intervention.